The Things I meant but Never Said.

Here’s the Things I Meant but I Never Said

At any one moment there are a million things running through ever single mind. However, only a few of those things actually make it form though to speech, and even fewer are actually said to another person. Why, you ask? Because we’re scared. We’re afraid that we’ll be rejected if we say what we really think, and humans can’t stand the though of rejection.

Sometimes we get rejected on too many times and all our thoughts and emotions come pouring out. But we get over it, and turn back into our normal bottled up selves. Well I’m sick of it! We need to stand up and say what we feel.

So I’m going to. I’m going to say what we all want to say. This is for every little girl that never fought back on the playground. For every boy who was too scared to tell a girl how he felt. For every office worker who was to afraid to stand up to their boss. This is for every person who was ever too afraid to say what they feel. I’m going to say what I feel, what I think.

I feel happy. I feel sad. Sometimes I feel like the walls are closing in and I can’t breathe. I get scared just like everyone else. I’m a horrible person. I lie and cheat and steal. I lie about things I have no reason to lie about. I make fun of people for no reason at all. I’m a saint. I volunteer at a soup kitchen and it makes me feel good. I tutor little kids that think I’m great. I have a fan club and they make my day. They think I’m perfect. I try to be perfect, but really I’m far from it.

I say I hate things when I secretly love them. I say things I don’t mean, and they hurt people. I want to hurt people sometimes. I hate people who are mean, but I’m mean too.

It hurts when people think I’m not good enough. It hurts when they ignore me. As much as I don’t want it to, it hurts every time they forget about me. And I hate myself for it. I hate them more though. I hate them for making me feel worthless. As if I can be replaced so easily.

I’d like to think I can’t be replaced. I’m one of a kind, just like everyone else. I’m the polar opposite of myself. I’m a liar. I try to be good. I’m mean. I stand up for people who won’t stand up for themselves. But you probably don’t care about me. I’m just a one of a kind, utterly replaceable girl, who’s trying to change the world. I know one person can’t change the world, but I’m making a dent, one voice at a time. So do your part. Say what you think. Say what you feel. Make a dent, change the world.