I found my poetry book....

I found my poetry book. Which in all reality, is a composition notebook with a bunch of poems and prose that I write. It's the most recent one, so it's got stuff from my senior year. I am going to share some with you. Okay, let me start with the inside of my cover. I put the following quotation that I wrote when I was in the eight grade..

"It's all about the beauty and captivation you hold inside of your heart which inspires the best ideas to become a very real reality...it's up to you."

Now, inside of it, I wrote about growing up, and this is what I had to say:

You know, sometimes when you think about it, growing up really sucks. Your whole childhood is spentduring the sticky-hot days of summer wishing you were older. Wishing for the freedoms you believe you'll inherit when you reach a certain age. Yet, somehow when you get older, you realize you wish to be younger because you didn't have to worry about gas money, jobs, meeting the graduation requirements, making your boss happy, etc...you just want to go back. But you can't. The only way to go in life is forward. You being to attach the phrase "last ever" to certain events. Such as your last ever ride to practice with your friend who is graduating, the last ever lunch when you sit with the seniors, the last ever concert...The last time you walk out of the High School. The last time you register for classes.
Graduation becomes the deal when you register for your senior year, you try to get classes with your friends, make the memories you've missed out on in all the fuss about the education. You aren't an 8th grader and you probably won't see these people ever again after Graduation. Then school will start again next year and you expect to see the cocky seniors-but you realize when the teacher asks how many seniors are in the class that you're one of them. Way leads on way and you discover that you graduate, go off to college, start families, get jobs, life goes forward. You become a human being.
Until one day it hits you-you're older. You're growing up exactly like you use to wish--
...only, it isn't what you thought, is it?

I wrote that my Junior year...The next one is something I wrote while sitting in the field at church one day and everyone was asking me where my friend was--

SHE

Sitting under the lonely tree,

I stare up at the sky-

just watching in peace as the clouds pass by.

Many thoughts grace my mind,

such as "how is she? does she remember me?"

I stare in the direction and wonder,

"Does she think about me?"

Someone takes a seat,

beneath the tree beside of me,

quietly she turns to see,

"How exactly is she?"

She has a name,

but everyone knows it's much easier for me,

if everyone refers to her as 'she'

I smile back at them,

eyes sort of puffy,

take a solid breath and reply,

"I don't know, she doesn't talk to me."

They always nod, get up, and walk away.

They know not to ask me twice.

for they know I wish she would just say "hi"

I stare at the sky-

lay back on my arms,

glancing in her direction I mutter,

"She's probably at home."

It wasn't my best work.

Born into diversity,

where skin color & religion

are counted among things people can hate-

amazed with music,

it becomes her escape.

captivated by art,

She decides how to interpret it.

Mixed race

choices of how to save grace

founded on freedom to choose

only to be persecuted

heritage & background

it's all the same

so love each other

we're not different at all

grab onto a different person's hand

before we all fall.

find your own saving grace

before it's too late

take a deep breath in,

it's nothing to do with race, religion or skin,

we all beautiful anyway.

That was just something I wrote after having enough of people being prejudiced against other individuals when we're all really the same.

Trapped in a world

where none can comprehend

listening to no one

taking silent breaths in

given an opportunity

yet taking the long way around

pathetic excuse for a human,

can't keep her feet on the ground.

forced to the limits

can anyone understand?

----FIN----